Monday, June 22, 2009

What a difference a 'tude makes

Since mid 2001, I have been taking singing lessons. Sounds like a long time to be learning how to sing I know, and I can confidently say, I'll continue taking lessons for quite some time.
Any trained singer would probably say the same thing - just like an athlete needs to continue to train, so to does a singer. You need to master your technique, learn to apply it to different styles of music, flex the muscle, learn to be "show" ready.
One week you may have everything in your control - pitch, tone, support, interpretation, the next week you are flat, lazy, forcing the sound, in short - a mess.
So you go home and practice - breathing exercises, tilting exercises, belting exercises, exercises for support, connecting with the song - working out what the hell the song is really about. You come back for your next lesson and you have, fingers crossed, improved.
I spent years doing this. Every week though I felt good, I felt like a student and the mistakes just meant that I was learning and growing.
When I was younger, in high school, I had an incident that for the next decade silenced me and led me to believe I would never sing. My music teacher at the time had, during a performance at a school assembly, asked me to stand at the back and "mouth the words". Adding that I was flat. (Referring to my voice of course - I doubt I would ever be described as flat in any other context, something I am finally, at 33, quite proud of!)
In a strange roundabout way, this incident has actually shaped me as a singer. I really wanted to prove ol' Miss Tooth that she was wrong and get back something that I dearly loved doing up until then. When I was ready, at 26, I found a teacher who, thankfully, was exactly who I needed. Over the last few years, he has been able to mould, direct and influence my voice. When I first started with him, I was so nervous that I would sing with my back to him. He has always been patient yet demands results.
Over the years I have found my strengths, worked on my weaknesses and have slowly, but surely worked out what kind of voice I have and what kind of singer I want to be. I don't just mean that I am an Alto Belter. I mean, I know what kind of voice I have. I know where its warm spots are, where it soars, where I need to steer clear of or at least have a contingency plan for. All the things that come from being with the same teacher for so long.
Most recently, in fact only last week, I declared that I felt like a singer. I have been able to sing for a while now, but only over the last twelve months have a felt like a singer. And it has made such a remarkable difference to how I feel about everything and how I approach everything.
It may be a long time, if ever, til I am able to actually show Miss Tooth that I don't stand at the back of the choir and mouth the words anymore. But I have finally gotten back what it was she took away, as well as a whole lot more on the journey.

So now all there is left for me to do is get out of the karaoke dens and onto a real stage. Next stop - Amanda Buckley is "A Whiter Shade of Pale" ....

1 comment:

Keira said...

Oh, this post made me smile! We all, of course, already knew you were a singer, but it's a far more powerful thing to really feel it yourself. Reading this has made me really look forward to reaching the milestone you have. Can't wait to see your new endeavours. Go you singer you! :)