Well in that case!

My stars say I should keep my mouth shut today. Avoid decisions. Basically just keep a low profile and go to sleep and save it for tomorrow.....

I will leave it then, to my co-worker, Hill Song Christian and all round sage advisor to sum up my thoughts today -

"Aw, that so sucks."

Waiting for life.....

Two days left.
Only two more days.
Then I will be 31.

I have LOVED being 30. I can honestly say that this has been the year of my life. This year I have:

Sorted out an apartment.
Wrote and performed a cabaret show.
Performed in two comedy festivals.
Entered a stand-up comedy competition.
Improvised a new play 7 times.
Filmed an ad for Japanese TV.
Filmed an online campaign for Yahoo!7.
Had two international guests stay at my house.
Visited four countries not my own.
Mended a broken heart.
Had my heart broken.
Met 3 men I thought were worth crying over.
Cried over two of them.
Said goodbye to a loved Nanna.
Welcomed a 2nd Nephew.
Made two new wonderful friends.
Strengthened some very important existing friendships.
Scared myself.
Rewarded myself.
Laughed. A lot.

I am sure that is just the tip of the iceberg.
I have very recently learnt that if I cannot understand myself at times, I cannot really expect someone else to. Not that I want to go all "confessional" but I'm feeling a little reflective this afternoon...what with the lack of work in my tray...my mind is wandering.

I have wanted to be in my 30's for the longest time, I was never keen on being in my 20's, but I think there is something around the corner that only my 30's could bring. This year was the start of me liking who I am, LOVING the community of friends and family I have and being ready to take a big swing at life. To start understanding who I am and what I want.

In two more days, my 30's will be here....I cannot wait.

She who laughs last....

Laughs loudest. Yes. Its true. When the she is me. Actually if the she is me, then it makes no difference whether I laugh first or last....

Recently I was made to feel somewhat of a pariah because of my laugh and I thank those of you who rallied behind me and said lovely nice things.

And so I must also thank Dan Willis, UK Comedian and saviour of the laughter. Last night at the Comedy Store, approximately 10.30pm, Mr Willis not only acknowledged the laugh, but praised it, making this little Australian a very happy lady. No longer will I giggle into my hands, no more will I bow my head - oh no, its slapping thighs and throwing back heads and laughing long and loud from now on in.
Take that Benita.
Take that.

People....they rock!

My Father retired this year. After 45 years with the same company. Pretty extraordinary and not likely to be something I, or anyone of my generation will experience.
I had the pleasure of accompanying my Dad, along with my Mum, to his send off celebrations this week, a truly wonderful experience.
Something happens as you get older, you see your parents as people, not just protectors, providers or whatever else of the hundreds of things they are to a child. I was completely happy, proud and inspired to get a glimpse of the life my Dad leads away from his family.
It turns out, as I have always suspected, that he is respected, that he was a good boss, a great workmate, a wonderful friend...and most people think he is pretty darn good. Yes, as I always suspected, my Dad is a good man. A great man.

Here's to my Dad, Terry Buckley. My hero.

I have had a week of mixed reviews....up, down, you name it, I felt it this week. I finished this week high though, and happy, and relieved. People are so complex, so surprising, so unpredictable....I just love them. So if you're a person out there, look out, coz chances are, I have a little crush on you.

Why I'm Annoyed

I am tired.
Very sleepy.
Tres fatigue.

This makes me a little sensitive. A portion emotional. A deal irrational.

I did not get a lot of sleep this week, which is more or less normal, what with my continuing obsession with the relationship between myself and the cast of the West Wing - come on Josh, tell Donna you love her - and the fact that I have a hard time saying no...which I kinda like. But I am, as a result, fragile today.

My normal routine when I get to work is, coffee, cereal, emails - early starts mean its OK to eat brekky whilst checking out your inbox, and this usually puts me in good stead for the day - not this morning however...

A certain man had been in my shared office space, a man who had a rather strong smell, so strong in fact, that full hour after he has left, I can STILL smell him. I felt like I was eating a bowl of sweaty weet-bix and nothing says annoyed like a headache brought on body odour. I think odour should be spelt oh-dear coz damn if I didn't vomit a little in my mouth.

Its not a great start to my day. Also, there is almost NOTHING to do at work today, making the next 6 hours appear to be very long indeed. We do not even have a sick-bay where I could maybe lay down for a bit and get my strength back. All I have is an endless supply of tea and my ever increasing frustration to keep me company. I do not envy my co-workers at all....I can feel a tantrum coming on.......

I see dead people

Well, not people....although one day I may just decide to sit down and write about my whole "past life memory" thing that I have got going....but that is not for now.
No, what I mean is I see dead things. I did this morning anyway, and seeings as I live in the inner suburbs of Sydney, road kill should not be as common as it was today.

On my way to work this morning, at 6:45am on what would never ever be described a country road, I ran over the following dead things (let me make that incredibly clear - these were very dead, very squashed things):
1) a possum
2) a magpie
3) a cat

I was on a six lane highway with many vehicles around me so without the "swerve" luxury I would normally indulge in, I was forced to drive over these already very tragically dead animals.

Not the best start for a Karma Army Good Friday.....I feel the need to visit a petting zoo or similar to make amends with the animal kingdom.
Or maybe I will just not eat meat today.
Though I do feel like a Pauls Famous Hamburger for lunch.
Maybe I don't feel bad anymore - they were ALREADY dead afterall....and I mean, its not like a highway is any place for a possum anyway. Idiot animals. I mean, really, whats so important that they couldn't cross at the lights? - and the magpie??? HELLO!!! Whats the point in having wings????????????

I think I'll have a burger with the lot.

Oh the Shame!

I have a loud laugh.
Its got more personality than I'll ever have.
It has more friends than me.
It even has better hair....and that's saying a lot, as I have damn fine hair if I do say so myself.
In a way, I loathe my laugh. I wish it would be more cute, more girly, more subtle, but no, its a "couple of Yugoslavians trying to start up a Volkswagen" if you believe what Ross Noble had to say about it.
Two nights ago, Benita Collings, Playschool host - mentor of my toddlering years, friend of Jemima and Big Ted - pilot of the ROCKET CLOCK - told me to "be quiet". Her and her friend even moved seats because of my "belligerent chuckle". I wasn't meaning to wage war, just show my appreciation for the hilarity of the impro I was viewing.
Perhaps, maybe just, there will be silence from now on.

.....

Probably not though.

Did you know?

I learnt something this morning.
God IS coming back.
Who knows where?
Who knows when?
BUT he IS coming and I should start preparing.
Apparently, I have not been taking it seriously enough...but there is still time for me to change my ways.

Or...you know, I could just take the piss and post a blog about my Hillsong co-worker.

I haven't decided yet.

Amen.